September 2012
August 2012
“Prayer in my later years has become simply letting myself be nakedly known, as I am, in all my ordinariness, face to face, without any masks or even religious makeup.”
—Richard Rohr, A Lever and a Place to Stand
“But those of us who do think ethics play a role in coffee will agree with Vandana Shiva, a leading Indian ecofeminist who argues that “drinking coffee is a political act” and Rigoberta Menchu, Nobel Laureate from Guatemala, who says, “Coffee is more than just a drink. It is about politics, survival, the Earth, and the lives of indigenous peoples.” It would be hard to find a more value-laden commodity than coffee.”
—Stephanie W. Aleman, “Green Coffee, Green Consumers—Green Philosophy?” in Coffee: Philosophy for Everyone
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Because we must learn to live in the tension. We must learn to wisely hold it all. And if we can do this, we will find spaces in the tension—space for wisdom and peace and community.
We need to make our home in the tension, because all of life is happening in the middle of it. In the middle of our tension…
The urge to do violence to the ideas and beliefs of people with different political beliefs or faith traditions or worldviews will subside. Because we will have discovered the battle really isn’t between us and them. If we are willing to look closely, we will discover the battle is contained entirely within us.
We will experience each other as prisoners of our own internal wars, and with intimate knowledge of the experience, we will find ourselves eager to free each other, as well.
We will find a way to encounter conflict with strength…and with forgiveness.
We will walk into hatred and bring justice…as well as mercy.
We will stumble upon ignorance and shine knowledge there…with humility.
So, open yourself to the tension within, find a home there, find a deep and abiding love for yourself there, and then scatter that love everywhere you go.
” —Dr. Kelly Flanagan
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Wake up fifteen minutes early, but not in order to get a jump on the day. Instead, spend five minutes opening your eyes slowly, opening the eyes of your mind and your heart to a new day pregnant with the opportunity to rest. Feel the warmth of the covers on a cold winter morning. Attend to the dance of light on the ceiling from a summer sunrise.
Do nothing to the moment. Simply allow your self to be in the moment.
” —Why The Amish Have It Better Than You
Marriage Is For Losers →
drkellyflanagan.com
But there is a third kind of marriage. The third kind of marriage is not perfect, not even close. But a decision has been made, and two people have decided to love each other to the limit, and to sacrifice the most important thing of all—themselves. In these marriages, losing becomes a way of life, a competition to see who can listen to, care for, serve, forgive, and accept the other the most. The marriage becomes a competition to see who can change in ways that are most healing to the other, to see who can give of themselves in ways that most increase the dignity and strength of the other. These marriages form people who can be small and humble and merciful and loving and peaceful.
And they are revolutionary, in the purest sense of the word.
… .
In marriage, losing is letting go of the need to fix everything for your partner, listening to their darkest parts with a heart ache rather than a solution. It’s being even more present in the painful moments than in the good times. It’s finding ways to be humble and open, even when everything in you says that you’re right and they are wrong. It’s doing what is right and good for your spouse, even when big things need to be sacrificed, like a job, or a relationship, or an ego. It is forgiveness, quickly and voluntarily. It is eliminating anything from your life, even the things you love, if they are keeping you from attending, caring, and serving. It is seeking peace by accepting the healthy but crazy-making things about your partner because, you remember, those were the things you fell in love with in the first place. It is knowing that your spouse will never fully understand you, will never truly love you unconditionally—because they are a broken creature, too—and loving them to the end anyway.
Our pain is the secret to life: →
drkellyflanagan.com
We build our lives around comfort and safety and ease. We feel entitled to painless living. Both physically and emotionally. We will go to great lengths to avoid our interior pain—our sadness, grief, powerlessness, fear, despair, shame, and anger. As Carl Jung said, “People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul.”
But what is the psychological equivalent of a painkilling pill?
I think we numb our psychological pain with myth.
By myth, I mean the ever-so-slightly deceptive stories we tell ourselves. About ourselves. About other people. About the world we live in. Our personal myths are the beliefs that protect us from the pain of life.*
